maaf harus ngelanggar buat ga dulu ngepost hal hal yang kaya gini.
but......



segitunya kah?
baru aja aku ngebaca blognya. dan ternyata masih banyak yang aku ga tau.
aku cuma fokus sama satu postingan aja. padahal..
almost all itu tentang dia.
mungkin itu emang masa lalunya. semua orang punya masa lalu, mau seneng, sedih, sakit hati.
tapi tiap kata yang dia tulis di blognya itu nandain klo dia sangat amat bangga pernah kenal dan have a special relationship sama orang yg paling cantik, paling baik, paling perhatian, paling semuanyaaa. ga ada yg bisa ngalahin.
dia kaya kena hipnotis gitu.
emang bener bener ya bisa bgt dia bikin semua cowo terpesona, terpikat.


emang iya si, ga ada cewe yg bisa segitunya kaya dia.
aku bukan dia yg bisa bangunin kamu tiap pagi. ngingetin solat tiap azan. ngingetin makan tiap jam makan. ngingetin tidur tiap jam tidur.
aku bukan dia yg sangat sangat independen. kemana mana bisa sendirian. ga tergantung sama orang kalo butuh apa apa. yg bisa selalu kemana mana sendirian. ngerjain apa apa sendirian. serba bisa.
aku bukan dia yg kalo tiap jalan atau ketemu sama kamu selalu diinget inget. selalu berkesan. selalu bikin senyum senyum sendiri.
aku bukan dia yg mungkin ditungguin smsnya. telfonnya. yang selalu bikin deg degan, yg bikin kamu harus muter otak buat bikin ketawa.
aku bukan dia yg selalu ngasih semangat dikala butuh semangat.
aku bukan dia yg selalu nyenengin dan bikin kamu kawatir klo tiba tiba sedih atau berubah mood
aku bukan dia yg sempurna


aku ya kaya gini aja
yang kekanakan. ga dewasa. ceroboh. pelupa. berantakan. suka bangun kesiangan. jarang mandi. cuek. lebih banyak diem dan dengerin. ga keibuan sama skali. males beresin kamar. cengeng. moody. ga pinter ngomong. ga berbakat nyanyi. suara cempreng. makan mulu. jarang olahraga. nyimpen lemak dimana mana. tinggi pas pasan. muka pas pasan. sering dikira anak smp. klo nyetir ga kira kira. ga perhatian. kurang peka. garing. nothing special dan sangat bertolak belakang.



aku jauh banget mungkin dari yang kamu pengenin
tapi tolong kalau lagi sama aku jangan omongannya dikit dikit dihubungin ke dia terus.
aku ga tau apa yg ada dipikiran kamu.
just keep it. aku ga usah tau.



its already 2 a.m.
still have final test.
i better sleep now
see ya


.dila.

Labels: lovelovelove

baru aja sejam yg lalu.

Labels: lovelovelove, my dreams

this is the lyric of my endless love.
an old song. but it really thoughtfull

Labels: lovelovelove

hari ini udah 1 bln 3 hari
:)
alhamdulillah udah nyampe sebulan aja, ga kerasa tiap minggu nungguin ada yg pulang ke bdg, tau-tau udah 4 minggu dilewatin.

tadi aku sama dia hampir berantem gara2 hal yang kaya biasa, dia cuek.
aku baru nyampe rumah jam setengah 9 aja ga dicariin, trus aku kira dia udah tidur. aku bbmin dia ga dibales abisnya. pas sekalinya udah dibales malah mau makan dulu. -_____- capee deh.
aku kesel kan. dia gitu amat si, msh aja cuek bebek sama aku. udah gitu udah tau aku bls bbm dianya dikit2, jutek gitu, eh malah ga ditanyain kenapa. tambah aja sebeel. aku bbmin lg aja, eh taunya hp nya mati.
iiiiiih.. bener2 deh ini mah.

tapi, ternyata eh ternyata ga lama kemudian ada yg nelpon. taunya dia. hehee
yaudah aku angkat, trus masih yg bete bete gitu. pas udah ngobrol2, dia cerita trnyata td dia lg ngurusin tiket buat plg bsk, trus baru bgt pulang tadi emang laper jd langsung makan.
aku lgsg ngerasa bersalah. aku udah ngirain yg ngga2. hehe. maaf yaaa.
aku ga jd deh marah2nya. trus kita ngobrol2 lamaa banget sampe hmpir 2,5 jam.
ga pernah selama ini.
aku seneeeng bangeet pokoknya. semua diceritain. apa aja deh smpe yg ga jelaslah.
haha

o iyaa. trus tadi gara2 baca blognya pacar slh seorang yg aku kenal. itu beneran sedih bgt. kasiaan dia.
pas lg baca aku jd ikutan kepikiran. 
heh, kamu yg disana jgn sampe kaya gitu yaa.
i know you won't. i believe
:D
aku jg ga bakalan kaya gitu kok, tenang aja.
amiiiin.

trus kenapa judulnya 140 km?
soalnya kita itu, aku dan dia. trus slh seorang cewe dan cowo itu juga berada disituasi yg sama
140 km distance relationship.
2 hours and a half relationship.
by travel, bus, or train relationship.
once in a week relationship. (kalo pulang tiap minggu tp :p)
between J and B town relationship.
yeah, whatever the name of relationship. i hope that ours not end like theirs.






:')


*eh hrusnya bsk hrus bisa bngunin dia jm 4 pagi, sekarang malah ngeblog
haha.
bismillah bsk bisa bangunin. i gotta sleep now.
byee.

.dila.

Labels: lovelovelove

i don't know what kind of feeling is this
but i'm very happy to meet you, to know you, and to be your special one.
you treat me like a princess
like i am the only one for you
when you said that you want to take this relationship seriously, i can't say anything
just wish that you are 'the one' for me

can't wait for this weekend
miss you so *deephug*

Labels: lovelovelove, my personal live

it's been 9 days, and 7 hours
and this gonna kill me.

I never in this kind of relationships before.
Long Distance Relationship or LDR is when two people love each other but they separated in distance, such in different town, different country or different planet.
after I did it in a week, its harder than I thought.
eventhough its only Jakarta-Bandung which need 2 hours.
maybe on the first, second, third day is ok, we often keep in touch. In the morning, day, night after he went home. with bbm, or maybe little phone. he always let me know when he went to work, lunch, and already finished. he usually tell me don't forget to eat or pray. and said good nite to me.

and the hardest part is I can't wait for weekend, I always want that day pass quickly so we can meet.
when he came I feel so happy, we enjoyed that time. 12 hours we spent together, for watch movie, lunch, karaoke, and window shopping. one day for a week.
but, after one day together I must get ready for another week without him. its terrible.

one day, our communication become less than before.
i don't know why, maybe he is so busy like celebrity now. so he don't have enough time to just remind me to eat.
in that day i only had 4 rows bbm from him in the morning when he went, 5 rows in the afternoon while he was in a rush to enter the class. and nothing at night. -______-
but, he finally called me in 8.10 p.m
oh crap. i really wanna screaaaam.
why you did it to me. :'(

but, i have decided to accept you to be my boyfriend so i must accept you just the way you are. how hard it is.
i try.
but you know what, its not only you who need a care and love. from the deepest of my heart, I need it too, really.

ok, to make me stronger. i found some Quotes 'bout LDR

"Distance means so little when someone means so much."

and

"I know when I leave, the distance will keep us apart. But distance, no matter how far, can't change these feelings in my heart ~ Unknown Author" 

I hope you're into the 2nd Quotes.
hehe.
miss u.
:*

.dila.

Labels: lovelovelove, my personal live

22nd November 2010
wednesday Monday (lupa hari, haha)

hey, today it's my birthdaay
:D
hehehe, i'm so happy right now, can't stop smiling

pertama, ini gara2 kejadian kemaren, something special happen..
very surprised.
kmren dia akhrnya bilaang jugaa, kaget. bingung. deg2an. campur aduk deh pokoknyaa
jd kemaren abis makan2, dia blg mau ngsih kado ke aku, yaudah aku ikutin ke mbl, trus pas ddlm mbil, dia ngasiin kadonyaa. kotak gitu, agak sedikit gede.
trus abis ngbrol2 dikit, dia kan mau buru-buru pulang ke jakarta, yaudah aku blg mau plg skrg? trus tapi taunya dia malah ngluarin bungaa
aaaaw :)
tp sblom ngasih dia nyopotin hrganya dlu, hahaha, kocak deh.
trus udah gitu aku kira udah kan, trus taunya dia ngmbil hp trus nyetel lagu no air, trus smbil blg klo he likes me.. gilaaaa, kageet. aku ga prnah nyangka dia bakalan blg itu pas saat itu juga.
aku ketawa2, abisnya dia ngmngnya kyk biasa aja, trus smbil snyum2. trus dia blg 'heh ini serius bukan becandaa'. trus aku tnya ke dia mau djwb skrg? trus dia blg iya.
akhirnyaaa stlah bbrapa menit malu2 ga jelas, aku jawab. jawabannyaa iyaaa
huahahahaha..
aduuh ga tau knapa abis blg itu msh ga kerasa apa2an, seneeeng si, tapi tu kyk mimpi ajaa, kyk yg boongan.
aaaah, maaluuuu bgt pkknyaa
trus abs itu lgsung canggung gitu. haha

mmmm.. mdh2an si ini bukan cuma kyk gini doang, mdh2an bisa langgeng, baik2 aja, ga ada marah2an, ga ada nangis2an.. amiiiiiiin ya Allah.
makaasih yaaa buat yg kemareen. :)
makasih buat onyeetnyaa, hehe
o iyaa, kocaknya lagi didlm kadonya ga ada krtu ucapannyaa, huahaha.. kirain mngkin emng ga ngsh kali ya, kn dia blg ga bisa romantis. yaudah gapapa si, cuma lucuu aja. trus taunya pas diblgn ktnya ketinggalan ga dimsukin sm mbanyaa
haha, adaa2 ajaa sii.

trus seneng yg kduaa gara2 aku ulang tauun hari inii..
aku dapet kue dari pinaa.. aku kira ga bakalan tiup lilin taun ini.
makasih yaa pinaa yg cantik. hihihi
paling cantik sdunia deh. ;) mmmuaah :*
gara2 pina aku jd bisa tiup lilin slama 4 taun 3 taun ini. haha (smpe lupa udah brpa taun temenan)
trus byk yg udah ngucapin sm ngsh slamet. amiiin, mdh2an smuanya terkabuul.

tapi ada 1 yg bikin sebeel, aku skrg 20 tauuuun..
udah mulai kepalaa duaa, noo waay
hahaha
udah ilang ni masa2 belasan, sekarang jd ganti masa2 duapuluhan
-______-

yg pnting dari smuanya, aku slalu seneeng dihari ulang tauun.
ngerasa deket banget sama smuanyaa :)

o iyaa, cepet pulang yaa yg di jkt
:* :*
xoxo

.dila.

Labels: events, lovelovelove, my personal live

i got to tell ya somethin
i can't stop smiling when i remember this :)
it's a small thing, but i think it is soo sweet and make me never (want to) forget this moment

on Moday, i was in the begining of mid test, and i still don't understand about the project management subject. because i rarely take attention to the lecturer, i sat on the back of class and chatting or gossiping with my friends.
so, i asked someone to teach me that subject, and he said yes. then, we studied together in the library, and its so quite, just a few people went there.
and, i started study. he taught me for 2 hours before my English test begun. he was very nice, and looked clever. :)
while studied, we have a little sweet conversation (maybe just me consider it sweet, haha) and until we finished.
before i went to the class, i told him that my palm was get peeled off
me : "my palm usually wet, not dry and peeled off like this"
him : "really? you like a snake, get peeled off, haha"
me : "o yeah, you never know that huh"
him : "let me see your nail, if your nail is purple it indicates heart disease"
me : "here" (i show my nail)
he hold and took my hand close to him, and saw my nail
him : "hey, your nail is purple"
me : "o my god, what should i do"
him : "thats ok, calm down" (smiling)
the colouring words make me melted and embarrassed.
how can he did it to me, he successful take my heart, lol


but, i don't know that he really into me or not, its said that 'grey feeling'
hope that 'grey feeling' change become white
:)
now just let it flow. i just want you to know that i'm happy have time together with you
and i can forget the sadness before
thank youu

.dila.

Labels: lovelovelove, my personal live

udah lama ga pernah ngeblog lagi, kangeen..
he.

oke, mungkin sekarang waktunya buat lebih serius, kyknya akhir tahun ini bakalan penuh dengan stress.
untuk saat ini jangan mikirin seneng-seneng dulu (tapi klo sekali2 si boleh, hehe), deadline nyerahin proposal TA udah semakin deket, pas seminggu lagi. dan aku masih belum yakin itu fix buat dikumpulin. semoga beberapa hari lagi bisa berubah jadi sangat yakin. amiiiin..
:)
skrg pokoknya usaha duluu aja, soal lanjut apa ngganya mudah2an Allah ngelancarin dan emang itu yang terbaik buat aku. bismillah.

selain masalah deadline, skrg aku juga lagi bikin keputusan besar, yang diawal emang susah bgt buat dihadapi. masih suka ngerasa kyknya aku ga bakalan bisa ni klo ga ada dia. tapi klo diinget-inget lagi masalah yang akhir-akhir ini dia buat, trus sifatnya yang ga berubah dari awal, padahal udah sering dibilangin, diingetin, tapi dia tetep aja gitu, ga berubah. masih ga dewasa. klo sama2 ga dewasa kyk gini susah juga. aku juga udah cape dimarahin terus, dikekang, ga boleh ini itu. gilaa segitunya gituu.
huuuuhh.
makanya sekarang udah keputusan fix, mudah2an emang ini yg terbaik buat berdua. aku bisa bebas ngapa2in, ga takut dimrahin lagi, trus dia juga bisa bebas terserah dia.
skrg aja selama 2 minggu dengan status yang kyk gini, aku ngerasa enak aja, udah nyaman, jadi aku pikir memang harusnya kyk gini.
bener2 banyak pikiran akhir2 ini. :(
maafin klo ternyata keputusan ini jd bikin ga enak.makasih buat semuanya.

sekarang saatnya fokus buat ngurusin diri sendiri, walaupun mgkin untuk sekarang bakal ga ada yang sering2 nemenin, tapi aku bisa kok. pasti bisaa :D
masih ada mama, papa, adek, temen2 yang sayang sama aku.
mgkin dia pikir aku kyk yang gampang bgt ngelupain atau ngerasa kyk ga ada apa2. believe me, it's hard.

ternyata bisa juga ngeblog yang isinya beginian. haha


love,
.dila.

Labels: lovelovelove, my personal live